Tower of Babel

I'm in Starbucks. Who isn't?

crankyjewishguy (CJG) spends an inordinate amount of time (and money) in Starbucks, but he hates his local Starbucks because it's very crowded and noisy. But he keeps going back because it's close to home. At Starbucks, CJG observes that 99% of the population is self-absorbed and completely oblivious. Here is a bunch of pictures of people in Starbucks.

"Hold on. The asshole at the cash register
 is interrupting me to take my order."

"Hey, I finally got laid last night!"

"My gastroenterologist says I have three
polyps on my colon, can you believe that?"

Waiting for upgrade (or Godot).

This is more like it.

"A black man is president? That's rich!"

"I'm in Starbucks. Where are you?"

"Am I the world's biggest schmuck, or what?"

"The dorks behind me are telling me to shut the fuck up.

What's their problem?"

What a powerful and important man.

CJG has written to Starbucks about eight thousand times suggesting that if they want to move a notch above McDonald's they should encourage customers to keep cell phone conversations private, preferably by taking them outside. (CJG always mentions he is a major Starbucks stockholder. He thinks he owns at least five shares.) Of course, Starbucks never does anything except send him coupons for free drinks with a preprinted card that says they hope his next visit is better. (For your free coupon, send a complaint of any kind to Starbucks by clicking here.) CJG thinks one problem is that the Starbucks logo sends the completely wrong message: the mermaid appears to be holding two cell phones, one in each flipper.