Now, CJG totally ruined any suspense on this one with his post two days ago where he shared a photo of this woman who, it should be obvious, is clearly having a bad hair day:
But, let's move beyond She Who Shall Not be Named and simply concede that for reasons that hardly need listing, she is the undisputed No. 1 annoying person of the year. So, starting with No. 10 and counting down to No. 2, here they are:
No. 10: Newt "I'll Say Anything No Matter How Idiotic to Try and Get Some of the Media Attention Now Going to that Woman from Alaska" Gingrich. His statement that to understand President Obama's world view one has to understand the mindset of Luo tribesman of Kenya was racist and moronic. And his "I think I'm the smartest guy in the room" demeanor is the equivalent of scraping your fingernails on a chalkboard.
No. 9: Brett Favre. Talk about over-exposed, the guy texted pictures of his penis to a female employee of the New York Jets. CJG is glad he's not in Brett's calling circle. Favre should have left at the top of his game; instead he kept coming back over and over and getting the shit kicked out of him on and off the football field. Just because of him CJG would never buy a pair of Wrangler jeans. This isn't the picture of Brett Favre CJG wanted to show you, but the other one isn't available.
No. 8: That Nigerian widow who keeps e-mailing CJG and asking him to help her move millions of dollars from secret bank accounts in Nigeria to the United States. CJG is tired of writing back to her and explaining that he only helps the poor and disadvantaged. CJG is also getting suspicious that this is some kind of scam, probably being perpetrated by this guy:
No. 7: FOX News diva Greta van Sustern or Cistern or Susteren or whatever the fuck her name is. Plastic surgery did nothing to help her cause. She's still unwatchable.
No. 6: Flo, the Progressive Insurance Lady. Whoever sold this ad campaign to the execs at Progressive is a genius, but not at advertising because this has to be the lamest ad campaign CJG has ever seen. The GEICO Gekko wipes the floor with this dipshit.
No. 5: Tony Hayward, the former CEO of British Petroleum and huge yacht owner. True story: a couple of weeks after the rig explosion, BP put up a virtual suggestion box on its web site where ordinary folks could submit their ideas for stopping the spill. CJG was game: he wrote in and suggested they lower BP executives directly into the broken pipe to staunch the flow. The very next day, CJG received an e-mail from BP's "technical team" thanking him for his suggestion but explaining that after careful review CJG's idea could not be applied "under the very challenging and specific operating conditions in the Gulf." Seriously? How hard could it be to put cement boots on these guys and stuff them into a pipe? They do that off the coast of New Jersey all the time. Tony Hayward not only said ten of the stupidest things uttered in public in 2010, his uncanny resemblance to Mr. Bean made him doubly annoying. Can you tell which is which?
No. 4: The Three Musketeers, a/k/a Mitch McConnell, Eric Cantor and John Boehner. Their highest priority was ensuring tax cuts for the wealthiest 2% of Americans and they were willing to let taxes go up on the other 98% to get their way. Those 2%, they argued, are the "job creators" and unless they got their tax breaks well, they just weren't going to create those jobs for the proletariat. Funny, the rich got their tax cuts early in Bush's first term and by the end of the Bush years the economy lost 8 million jobs. CJG doesn't pretend to have a degree in economics, but before the tax cuts, during the Clinton years, the economy added 23 million jobs. To CJG guy this suggests the connection between tax cuts and jobs is being a wee bit overstated. In fact, CJG thinks this job talk is just a ruse and the real reason this is The Three Musketeers' highest priority is that 98% of these guys' campaign funds come from...you guessed it, the richest 2%. By the way, to CJG's knowledge, Cantor is, surprisingly, the only Jew on this top ten most annoying list though he has his suspicions about Brett Favre. But unless we see those pictures we may never know.
No. 2: Long before he got himself fired from CNN for a ignorant rant about Jews and the media, Rick Sanchez was a bloviator of the first order. The guy's Ted Baxter-esque ego was so big and his talent so small, CJG would sit dumbstruck before his television wondering how Ricky ever landed a job that paid more than minimum wage. If you never saw his coverage of the Hawaii tsunami that fizzled, it's a classic. Do yourself a favor and watch this windbag in action.
Which brings us, once again, to our number one annoying person of 2010, Sar...oops...She Who Shall Not be Named (SWSNBN). As CJG noted above, there are about a million reasons he finds SWSNBN the world's most annoying person, but one of them is her utter disrespect for the native tongue. CJG believes that the ability to speak English with reasonable fluency should be a requirement for any aspiring president, and certainly for any media hound, and it's statements like this one, spoken on the Sean Inanity Show in November, that really make CJG want to pour candle wax in his ears: "I want to help clean up the state that is so sorry today of journalism. And I have a communications degree." And a hard won degree no doubt.
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| Maybe she should see a neurologist about that tic. |
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