If I Only Had a Brain

Wow. Crankyjewishguy (CJG) hardly knows where to begin. This week proved it's a target-rich environment out there.

Let's start with last night's debate performance by Not Ready for Prime Time Rick Perry who couldn't remember one of the three federal agencies he is pledging to eliminate as president which is actually OK since his chances of becoming president just dropped to about negative 100%. Perry has come off as such a buffoon that he's probably also dealt a serious blow to being re-elected governor of whatever state he thinks he is governor of. CJG read a report that he recently signed an execution order for an inmate on death row in New Jersey only to be reminded by a senior aide that he is governor if Texas. "Is that next to Louisiana?" the incredulous governor was overheard to ask. As Jonathan Chait of New York Magazine writes this morning, "ultimately, Rick Perry is going to be remembered as the man too stupid to win this Republican nomination. That is a remarkable feat." 

Rick Perry demonstrates his technique for neutering a Texas Longhorn.

Then, of course, there's the brilliantly run Herman Cain campaign which confirmed to Sean Inanity that the son of one of Cain's accusers works for POLITICO, the news outlet that broke the Cain sexual harassment story. Booya! Nailed that sucker. Except that the guy in question used to work at POLITICO and now works for another news organization. An insignificant, minor discrepancy? Perhaps. But it turns out the guy isn't even related to the accuser; they just happen to have the same last name! Now that's rich!

If Herman Cain doesn't want anyone looking into past allegations of sexual harrassment, maybe he should run for office in Italy where the Prime Minister can have sex with an underage prostitute and still hold on to power, only to be undone by the country's faltering economy. After all, as former chairman of Godfather's Pizza, if anyone is entitled to honorary citizenship in Italy it would be Cain. CJG wants to repeat that he doesn't know if these allegations are true, but the women who have come forward so far seem credible and to argue that this is irrelevant is disingenuous. Character is important and if a candidate is a serial harasser of women, well then voters can decide how important it is to them. But Cain's denials and the way his campaign is flailing around trying to assign blame for how the story became public doesn't pass the smell test. CJG's personal opinion is that this isn't some conspiracy to bring down Herman Cain. Who needs one? When it comes to self-destruction he's running a close second to Rick Perry.